Mental load and home organization: tips for true equality

mental load

For years we have been talking about female mental load linked to domestic and family organization, but has something really been done to ease the situation? Not at the institutional level, I would say, given that – especially after the pandemic – home and family care activities are still considered today to be female-related tasks and Covid-19, from this point of view, has worsened the situation.

Mental load, what is it?

When we talk about mental load, we are not just talking about all the activities carried out (mainly by women) in caring for the home and children, but also about all that continuous, uninterrupted flow of thoughts, to ensure that the home and family work, that they go forward day by day. The feeling of always having the brain in motion, busy organizing everyone’s life and day, so that everyone can leave the house with clean clothes, lunch in their basket and homework done. Take some refreshment by playing online pokies real money.

Do you find yourself a little bit inside? What are your experiences? All this is then joined by field work, that is, most women not only have their brains occupied with all these matters, but also have to do them alone.

Organization and care of the home and family

Gender disparities relating to family organization and management did not emerge with the pandemic. Even before Covid they were extremely evident and resulted objectively from countless researches conducted by various Observatories on gender equality. The difference begins to manifest itself between the ages of 11 and 14 and increases significantly with age.

Already in the daily times of children and young people, gender differences emerge in family work and the availability of free time, which worsen with increasing age. In your free time enjoy best online casino nz.

Family work, in fact, on average involves females for 30 ‘more than males : starting from the substantial parity between children up to 10 years, who dedicate only 20’ to it regardless of gender, the difference begins to show itself among the 11 and 14 years (+13 ‘for females), up to 59’ more between 15 and 24 years.

In the latter age group, only 44.2% of young males spend at least 10 ‘to carry out some family work activities, against 72.3% of females.

Women and economic independence

Having a regular job outside the family context, adequately and fairly paid, is essential from many points of view:

For personal fulfillment and we do not mean that a woman who does not work cannot feel satisfied in the family. We mean that a woman has the right to feel fully fulfilled, as a citizen and member of society, as well as as a wife and mother, with an occupation that allows her to make her own contribution to the progress and growth of the community, as well as to that of own family unit;

To take care of herself and her future life, even outside the family. Unfortunately, romantic relationships are sometimes interrupted and it is always women who pay the most expensive bill of a broken marriage. The women who have set aside their careers to devote themselves only to their families, the women who have given up work in order to be at the disposal of their children, in a word, the women that every year ISTAT photographs as inactive despite being able to work .

to cope with the prospect of a spouse’s premature death . In Italy, the life expectancy of a woman is 84.9 years, that of a man is 80.3, with a gap of about four and a half years (source: The life of women and men in Europe, portrait statistic of 2017 ). Statistically, therefore, every married woman who does not have a job of her own and is economically dependent on her husband will be forced to make major sacrifices to cope with her spouse’s survival. The situation is complicated, especially in the south and on the islands where the incidence of married women with children and not in employment is greater, when the death of the spouse occurs at a young age due to road or work accidents, and in the family unit there is one or more young children to raise.

It is necessary to be able to move away from toxic or dangerous sentimental situations for oneself and for the children. One of the reasons that most frequently induce women victims of family violence to procrastinate and postpone the request for help or the reporting of violent episodes is precisely the lack of economic independence ensuring that you and your children will survive after being separated from your partner. Having an income is essential to monitor your own safety and that of sons and daughters, as well as to be able to immediately escape from situations that seriously threaten them. In fact, the Italian State recognizes a minimum income defined as “freedom of freedom” for women victims of violence. But that’s not enough: we must be the master of our life, as well as the income necessary to safeguard it.

Reducing the female mental load and balancing it within the couple or family unit is possible. However, we need to clarify some concepts and learn to put into practice some small daily actions.

For many women, the first step in relieving the pressure is to understand that helping, delegating and sharing tasks are not the same.

It may seem trivial to say, but the culture of the husband “good because he helps at home” is still very widespread and, far from being of help, it instead contributes to reinforcing the concept that the main responsibility is female and that where the man you collaborate by carrying out some tasks, you are all in all good because – in fact – you provide help.

Help at home can at most be outside the family.

Our mother who offers to do the ironing for us, who accompanies or takes the children to school, who does the shopping for us while we are at work, is actually helping us. Because she is carrying out activities that do not fall within her sphere of responsibility and she is doing it out of pure spirit of liberality. She doesn’t have to, but she loves us, she loves her grandchildren and granddaughters, she knows we’re busy and so she offers to do some assignment for us.

Leave a Reply